159132001
May 20, when U.S. District Judge John E. Jones III ruled that denying same-sex couples the rights and benefits of marriage was unconstitutional, City Hall’s Register of Wills began issuing same-sex marriage licenses.
Nearly 120 of them were issued in the initial three-and-a-half days since Jones’ decision, and many South Philly couples were among the first in line.
One such duo, Oscar Cabrera and Christopher DiCapua of the 1300 block of South 13th Street, have been together for almost 19 years. Both Spanish professors at the Community College of Philadelphia, the Passyunk Square residents met in graduate school at the University of Kansas in 1995.
“On Tuesday we went as soon as we could. We were excited, so we said let’s just do it,” DiCapua said.
“We had been thinking about it for years,” Cabrera said.
The couple was among the first to file for a license, and on Friday, they were married by Mayor Michael A. Nutter in the Mayor’s Reception Hall.
“On Thursday afternoon, we got a call from the mayor’s office,” DiCapua explained, making their marriage not only historically significant, but also quite public. “We ended up being in all the newspapers, which I wasn’t expecting. When we were getting married, we had 10 cameras in our face.”
But it’s a price the two were willing to pay to take part in such a momentous occasion.
“In some ways, when you’re among the first, that happens, and we accept that and in some ways we’re kind of proud to have been the first and pave the way and put a face on our community,” DiCapua said.
Carin Berger, the primary attorney who advises and facilitates clerks in the offices within wills (Orphan’s Court, wills and marriage licenses), was tipped off on Monday afternoon by the ACLU that they might be accepting some lawful same-sex marriage applicants after the following day’s decision.
“It was a historic day and it was long overdue,” Berger said. “And we welcome the applicants with open hearts and minds and we continue to do so.”
The requirements are a current valid photo ID, proof of social security number in the form of an official document, proof of the dissolution of a previous marriage by certified copy of the divorce decree or a death certificate, and $80 in cash or money order. Valid licenses require a three-day waiting period to use it and a 60-day period of use.
So what does it mean, specifically?
“First, I think of love and what it means to be totally committed to another person in an enduring and loving way,” Burger said. “The benefits that follow would be financial: Filing a joint tax return, life insurance, benefits, pensions, any benefits through your employer, health insurance, any benefits that would accrue to any married couple are now available to same-sex couples.”
Noelle Foizen disturbed her partner, Carolyn Caton, in slumber on her way to work on Tuesday morning: “Babe, I think the ruling’s coming through today,” she said, but Carolyn wove her off. “We were following the cases and we thought the rulings might come in June and even though things had been going well for marriage equality in other states, I wasn’t confident that PA would tow the line.”
Foizen and Caton, residents of the 1500 block of East Passyunk Avenue, have been together for about 13 years (“We’re starting to lose count,” Caton said). The Temple graduates are both macro-level social workers who finished Masters in Social Work at Columbia University’s School of Social Work. Carolyn works in City Hall in the Mayor’s Office of Civic Engagement and Volunteer Services developing a program called PowerCorpsPHL (an AmeriCorps-like collaboration between the mayor’s and governor’s offices). And Foizen works for the Managing Director’s Office under the Deputy Mayor of Public Safety with emergency management.
“I just happened to be at the convention center for a conference,” Foizen said, she was following progress on Twitter, and at around 2:30, she “tweeted at the City to see if they were giving out marriage licenses.” A friend in the Mayor’s Office of Communications sent her a message to say “Go.”
But as Caton reminded, same-sex couples have been fighting and will continue to fight for years to come. They’ve worked for years to establish power of attorney for each other with lawyers,
“We’ve had to shore that up outside of marriage. That’s why, for me, I’m so happy about marriage because it’s a wonderful step for equality and the validity of relationships,” Canton said.
“People can still get fired for being gay,” Foizen said. “This is an awesome little step but we still have a ways to go.”
Cabrera shared a similar outlook.
“To me, emotionally, it’s very important to feel married to Chris,” he said.
“My heart was warmed by how welcoming and warm and human,” DiCapua said.
“And accepting,” added his husband.
“To have the city embrace and accept this in a public way was very important for us and for the whole gay community of course,” Cabrera concluded.
Berger added that in the 39-page decision that came from Harrisburg on Tuesday, Jones hoped this would be a sign of the evolution of equality that’s been going on over the past decade.
“One of the things he said was today we refer to this as same-sex marriage, but one day soon, he hopes, everybody will refer to it just as being married. In other words, there will be no distinction between marriage and same-sex marriage,” Berger explained.
The judge, a known conservative, ruled on the side of law.
“You can’t rule on emotions, you have to rule on the side of the law and what the law and facts support and interpret the law properly based on facts,” Berger said. “It ruled the existing law to be unconstitutional and that’s why same-sex marriages are permissible and out-of-state same-sex marriages are to be recognized in Pennsylvania.”
Staff Writer Bill Chenevert at bchenevert@southphillyreview.com or ext. 117.
159132001
159131991
